As Whitney grew up, she asked a lot of questions! She did this is school, inside of relationships and within the general public… she just wanted to know stuff. To learn, we need to ask questions. Many times we don’t ask questions as we don’t want to look stupid or uninformed. We may also feel we are too young to join a conversation. Whitney truly wanted to know details of situations, relationships, physical actions and the like. When it comes to asking questions… the answer can contain a sense of opinion, but should be based upon facts. Sometimes asking questions can just be a process of killing time, trying to be funny or to make someone look bad. Marilyn vos Savant is an author, lecturer and all around smart person. She has written the ‘Ask Marilyn’ column for Parade Magazine… a Sunday newspaper magazine, since 1986. Marilyn has answered questions for nearly 4 decades. She has shared some of the most interesting questions she has been asked over the years…
Asking questions should lead to a greater understanding of politics, religion, science, relationships… Whitney truly loved to learn… she had questions, so she asked the experts in her life, so as to come to greater insight of the world around her. Author and pastor John Maxwell wrote a book a few years ago titled Good Leaders ask Great Questions. His premise was… to be a better leader one must come to understand their students, employees and friends, as well as to understand how the world thinks and moves. Answers come when you ask questions… questions that give us greater knowledge of people and the world they live. We were all created by Father God. He gave us a body, mind and spirit. One is not better or bigger than the other. They are all needed to have a full life. Some may not be able to ask questions due to the hurdles of life. But most of the time questions are not asked due to EGO. In 2022 make a resolution to curb your ego and ask questions. Commit to learn about others, global, national and local issues. This practice keeps you informed about everything around you… and how you can step in and help make a difference for good.
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In the middle of difficulty lies opportunity… Albert Einstein For Einstein, solving problems was the best opportunity to take life to a higher level. He became the Albert Einstein that we know because of the way he looked at problems. Einstein saw problems or difficulties as opportunities for him, not problems. Problem solving is one way to take you to the next step of life. They are not there to make you suffer. Do you look at problems the way Einstein did? For Whitney Lee, she was always trying to solve the problems of others… relationships, resources and God related issues. Seeing someone in need made her uncomfortable, it caused her uneasiness… as she felt one of her great purposes was to counsel and comfort those in need. Today there is lots of adversity… lack of jobs, inflation, COVID, death… In the midst of this adversity there are many ways we can serve others. When the young shepherd David stepped out to take on Goliath he went to the brook and carefully selected stones to use in his battle with the giant. Just as David went to the creek, to gather the tools needed to serve, we too need to go to our source of supply-the Lord. What polished stones will you select to defeat your Goliath?” For you personally it may be peace or comfort. In helping another it may be the stones of humility, courage and prayer. We need to go to the Lord, seeking the tools to help those facing adversity. Pray about what needs to be done and ask the Lord to guide and direct your paths, so that you serve those in the midst of difficulty. The LORD is a stronghold for the oppressed, a stronghold in times of trouble. Psalm 9:9 Opportunity lies in the middle of difficulty… not in the beginning or end. In the middle indicates that you are invested in whatever is going on. Being in the middle of an alarming situation, shows you are devoted to what is going on. During COVID have you helped the elderly, the sick, families with little ones… if so, it means you are looking for opportunities to help, be a servant? This week… take some time and jot down areas of life, where there are opportunities to serve those in need. These needs may not just be for you, they can be for your family, co-workers, neighbors… Jesus was always looking for ways to serve those in need… blind, deaf, hungry, death of a loved one. You don’t need to look hard for opportunities… they are all around us. As we go about our day… keep this question in mind…Do you focus on resolving problems or you run away from them? Today… run to the difficulties, as these are opportunities to serve… making for a better world for us all. Over the past couple of months, I had the privilege of doing something that has been on my bucket list for decades… work the Olympics. After a year postponement due to COVID the Games were held in Tokyo, Japan, July-Aug, 2021. My assignment, men and women’s indoor volleyball. To say the least, my family was as excited as I was. The one who would have been most excited… Whitney Lee. See loved the Olympics… the pageantry, the competition, the celebration of excellence. She watched all of the gymnastics and swimming she could. She also loved the opening and closing ceremonies. The Olympics, highest level of sport in the world. Nation after nation sending its best to compete against the best. Very few of us will ever compete at that level. We can be great fans but maybe not Olympic level athletes. BUT… we can be the best in everyday life. This can be done as a student, parent, office or warehouse worker, teacher, doctor, police officer or home builder. Here are some thoughts about how to be the best version of yourself. Have gratitude. Every day, think about the things and people you are grateful for and the things that make you happy. Realize you earned some of what you have, but there are others that have assisted you along the way. Say ‘thank you’ to all those that have helped you and for the provisions you have been given. Become selfless. Think about other people and work every day to gain a better understanding of those around you. Engage in thoughtful conversations and take the time to listen to what other people are sharing with you. Also consider offering some of your personal resources to those in need. Be proud of your associations. Surround yourself at work, play and with your family…people that share your values and help you become the best version of yourself. If you are associating yourself with people who are keeping you from achieving your goals, you are hindering yourself from being your best. Be open to change. You can’t reach higher levels being exactly where you are today. This may mean being uncomfortable, stepping out of your comfort zone, and overcoming obstacles. Take action. Nothing works unless you get out and do the work. Being a couch potato gets you nowhere. I know too many that sit back and wait for opportunity to come to them. Reach out and grab it!! All Olympians train and train and train… and then compete. Action is needed to put your best out there! Whitney loved to serve people. She did this in the classroom, church, neighborhood and family. She was striving to be her best as often as possible. Three years ago today… Whitney went to be with Jesus. The world lost one of the best… may you and I honor her legacy and be great servants for God’s Kingdom. Always strive to be the best version of yourself. One of the many things I loved about my girl Whitney was she was not afraid to get help if she needed it – emotionally, mentally, or physically. I think that is why she choose to major in Psychology so she could understand how people think, why they act the way they do and how to help. Whitney was not afraid of the stigma associated seeing a professional and did not spend one minute thinking about what others thought of her need to seek assistance. While Whitney may not always take taken the professionals advice and was more than willing to share what she learned to “fix” you or as what I call “psych” me – she sought wise counsel when needed. We live in broken world and the number of friends and family I have hurting is to be honest unimaginable. When we lost Whitney the best piece of advice I was given was to get myself and family members into counseling. I cannot imagine where our family would be now if we had not taken that advice – I think blown up on every level. I feel called to share some thoughts on counseling in hope that it might encourage some of you to overcome your fears and get help. I did some research on counselling and with the help information put out by Coe College I wanted to share it with you. https://www.coe.edu/student-life/student-life-resources/health-wellness/mental-health-counseling/potential-benefits-counseling Benefits of counseling The counseling process is, in many ways, is like an educational experience. The individual can learn more about him/herself, but also acquires new skills. Sometimes, counseling involves learning more about a particular condition (e.g., depression, anxiety) by which the person is affected, so that he/she can better understand treatment options. Below are some examples of what you can gain from personal counseling:
We only get one shot in this life, and I want to be a person like Whitney who did her best to make the people she loved lives better not harder. As I go to meet my Savior and reunite with Whitney, my parents and so many others I want to be remembered for loving people hard and have no regrets. So what does that mean I need help from others along the way!! Sassy Words of Wisdom It’s hard to believe this coming Monday we will have celebrated three of Whitney’s birthdays without her being with us here on earth. There is not day – hour or even minute that we do not miss Whitney and her words still ring in our ears. To celebrate Whitney this year we decided to share her Top three favorite quotes and expand on how each continues to carry on her legacy. # 1 People Suck No one loved her people more than Whitney – but many did not like her because she was not afraid to call people out or say what needed to said. She was not afraid what people thought of her (with a few exceptions) and did not allow people to treat others around her or those she loved badly. When people behaved in an inappropriate way this was her go to line. Scripture tells us that we are blessed by people who suck – try to remember this!! Matthew 5:11 Blessed are you when people insult you, persecute you and falsely say all kinds of evil against you because of me # 2 Stop lighting yourself on fire to keep others warm Whitney used this line with her mom no less than three times a week. Somehow she learned at a very young age she knew we were not in control and could not control others people’s lives only God could. That only Christ could change their heart, choices or actions. Imagine the hours of time and thousands of dollars and hours of worry we could save if we let God handle people Matthew 6:34 Therefore do not worry about tomorrow, for tomorrow will worry about itself. Each day has enough trouble of its own Philippians 4:19 And my God will all your needs according the riches of his glory in Christ Jesus # 3 It was on sale No one loved a sale more than Whitney – if you needed anything just ask Whit and she could tell you where to find it at the cheapest price. She was willing to spend her money and your money all she needed was a credit card or amazon account. In fact – for week after she passed away Amazon packages were still arriving One area Whitney never looked for a sale on was her relationships. She loved hard. She was always calling, texting, writing a card or sending a gift to her people. She sacrificed hours and hours of time and money for others to make their lives better. She not only told people she loved them she showed people she loved them with her actions. As a dear friend put it .. “I remember her laugh, how silly she was at intense moments. I remember how determined she was from the minute I met her – smart, sassy and someone you want to love always.” Romans 12:10 Be devoted to one another in brotherly love. Honor one another above yourselves John 13:34 A new commandment I give to you, that you love one another: just as I have loved you, you also are to love one another So in honor of Whitney’s Bday …. Do this LOVE HARD NO REGRETS Life is full of highs and lows. Today six years ago March 7th was the day that Whitney had dreamed of since she was little. I have vivid memories of Whitney making her best friend Chris play wedding starting at the age of two. I am pretty sure she had her whole wedding planned even before she met her future husband Geoff. The week of Whitney’s wedding Colorado got pounded with snow and I remember thinking we will be even be able to have the service and reception. Will people be able to travel to come and experience the Big Day. But, in typical Colorado fashion just five days later the snow had melted, and the day could not have been more beautiful. No one could have known that day that just three plus years later – we would go from pure joy to deep sorrow letting our girl go to be with Jesus. As I reflect on the loss of Whitney, I am reminded just how important every single day and every interaction with the ones we love is so important. Love bears all things, believes all things, hopes all things and endures all things 1st Cor. 13:7 Like Colorado weather – relationships change over time both good and bad – some we even have to let go of, but those God has called us to are worth the fight. What does that mean – simply put sacrifice. We have to sacrifice our time, money and so many times being right. We have to do the hard work and deal with the hard issues no matter what the cost. We have to humble ourselves and ask for help. We have to look at ourselves and say what do I need to do to make the relationship better in spite of their actions or words. In her book – Forgiving What You Cannot Forget Lisa Terkeurst states “We can only see what the human mind can imagine. God is building something we cannot imagine.” I believe God works through relationships to teach us so much if we are willing to listen. It means hard and sorrowful days, weeks and maybe even years. Through it all he is building something we cannot imagine – that is so so so good!! Losing Whitney could have destroyed our families’ lives had we not had such strong and healthy relationships. Our family and friends literally carried us emotionally, financially, mentally and spiritually. Each one of these people put aside they own needs and wants to care for us in our greatest time of need. The result – we now live great joy again even though we desperately miss our girl. Relationships are the Lords greatest work and when working together can change a life, a community and our world. No one valued her relationships more than Whitney she was willing to walk through fire and give up everything for her people. Are we willing to do that? Imagine a place where we beared all things, believed all things, hoped all things and endured all things. LOVE HARD NO REGRETS!! Thank you for always taking care of this and honoring her In the middle of February… there are lots of reminders of LOVE! Most of those reminders center on Valentine’s Day. In our house we have a real valentine, Casey… born on February 14! There are several ways to express Love in our Western Culture, American society. Love encompasses a range of strong and positive emotional and mental states, from the most heavenly quality or good habit, the deepest interpersonal affection, to the simplest pleasure. An example of this range of meanings is that the love of a mother differs from the love of a spouse, which differs from the love of food. Most commonly, love refers to a feeling of strong attraction and emotional attachment. But, there is more… Valentine’s Day today is a mixture cards, candy, flowers and dinner out. All good expressions of Love, but what is LOVE? I ask every couple I am about to marry off… “in the context of marriage, what does Love mean?” The answers vary… It is how he makes me feel when he enters the room… this would be an Eros love. A love that focuses on my needs. I LOVE cheesecake! Great! I love to eat cheesecake… but when you are satisfied, you push it aside and go on your way. It is a selfish expression, it is one sided. Cheesecake satisfies you, but what do you do for the creamy dessert? Eros centers on ‘personal desire’… the desire to fulfill ones needs, not those of another. I also have been presented with this Love answer… helping someone when they are in need. This too is an act of Love… philia. This is described as a brotherly or friendship love. When you go to the grocery store and the grocer has the fruits and veggies you want, and you say Thank You. You need the grocer for a short time and you are blessed by their efforts… but when you get home, you forget about the one who stocked your favorite foods. The best answer to this Love question, as it refers to marriage is agape. This love word refers to unconditional love. It goes beyond just the emotions to the extent of seeking the best for others. Not just wanting the best… but doing the best! For God so loved the world that he gave his one and only Son, that whoever believes in him shall not perish but have eternal life. John 3:16. Also Greater love has no one than this: to lay down one's life for one's friends. John 15:13 God gave us Jesus, as a sacrifice, for the forgiveness of our sins. There was sacrifice, there was the giving of one’s best! This is the Love standard for a man and woman in marriage. This expression of Love is offered to all. There is no secret formula to develop this level of Love. I love you and will be beside you… NO MATTER WHAT! I have your back ALWAYS! Many couples get it right from the start… some take time to figure it out. Whitney Lee treated her short marriage with an agape, sacrificial love… giving and serving. When she passed 100’s of people shared how she “loved hard.” It's not hard to find someone who tells you they love you, it's hard to find someone who actually means it Whitney meant it! She gave, she sacrificed, and she served. She lived by the motto…a relationship is when two imperfect people refuse to give up on each other. A man and woman make a commitment in marriage… until death do we part. This is not the death of a relationship… but of the individual. In good times and bad, we stay committed. In sickness and health, we stay together. In times of rich bounty and poverty, we stay together. As you reflect on the issue of Love… ponder your relationships… especially those within your family… spouse, children, in-laws, nieces and nephews. Are you in it for the long haul, or for just what you ‘get’ from it right now? May your February be filled with Agape… now and forever and ever! Have you noticed the term… ‘New Beginnings’ pop up all over the internet, TV and in people’s conversations. This makes sense as here in January of 2021… most of the US and those around the world are looking for a new fresh start. We can say “Thank you” to COVID and that we are in the dawn of a new year, a time when people make resolutions for the coming 12 months. These resolutions feature pledges for… better eating habits, giving up vices, seeking better relationships and the like. While we may not do a good job at keeping these decrees, it is fun to look forward to a newness that comes with a new calendar year. The first and most prominent of New Beginnings can be found in the BIBLE…In the beginning God created the heavens and the earth. Gen 1:1. On day one God created the space we refer to as the earth and sky. Without these there would no place for man, the flocks of the field or the birds of the sky. I think we all look forward to the NEW, fresh BEGINNINGS. We love new clothes, a new car, a newborn baby, a new job… there is excitement to something fresh and modern. Are you looking to get out of your comfort zone and start your life over? Most of us reach a point where we get fed up with our current situation. During such times, letting go and starting over can be the best thing for you. This may mean to quit trying to control your life without the embrace of the One Who gave you life! Jesus Christ. When you let go of what doesn’t work, what holds you back and give it to the One Who saves… you are stepping out in faith… seeking to be the person the God of Creation designed you to be. Take the first step in faith. You don’t have to see the whole staircase, just take the first step. – Martin Luther King Jr. Whitney Lee always loved a new adventure… city to visit, food to experience, holding an infant. She also loved when someone came to the saving grace of Jesus Christ… they were now NEW in Jesus. The Bible is filled with references to people finding a new life and new beginning in Christ… there were 1000’s on a hillside eating fish and bread, the 12 disciples who planted Christian churches, there was a thief on a cross, there was Paul formally known as Saul… What about you? Therefore, if anyone is in Christ, that person is a new creation. The old has gone, the new is here! 2 Cor 5:17. Being NEW in Christ=accepting His sacrifice upon the cross for the forgiveness of your sins…accepting Him as your Lord and Savior. This means that anyone who accepts Jesus Christ has become a new person. “He will wipe every tear from their eyes. There will be no more death or mourning or crying or pain, for the old order of things has passed away. He who was seated on the throne said, “I am making everything new!” Then he said, “Write this down, for these words are trustworthy and true.” Revelation 21:4-5. Unmute Everyone is looking for a fresh start in 2021… job security, no masks, being able to gather in groups... All of those issues are great hopes for the year. As you ponder the coming year, consider accepting the One who offered Newness at creation and newness through forgiveness and salvation! Jesus offers the greatest HOPE to us all… may He be the center of your New Beginning in 2021. Whitney will be dancing in Heaven… celebrating with you! The Greatest Story Ever Told is a 1965 American epic film produced and directed by George Stevens. It is a retelling of the Biblical account of Jesus Christ, from the Nativity through to the Ascension. In the opening of the movie, three Wise Men are summoned by King Herod the Great, who remembers a prophecy of a coming Messiah. Herod sends the Wise Men to Bethlehem to confirm the child's existence. They find a young couple--Mary and Joseph and their newborn son in a manger. Mary tells the visitors that his name is Jesus. As the local shepherds watch, the Wise Men present gifts of gold, frankincense, and myrrh to the infant King. This is the overture of the movie. While the film goes on to tell the rest of the earthly account of Jesus, I want to focus on the opening, the Christmas Story. We are currently in the Christmas ‘season’. While the intent is to celebrate the birth of Christ, there seems to be a greater focus on the food, gifts, Santa, TV specials, songs… For many they have eliminated Jesus Christ out of the Christmas story. Today, sadly, it is not Christmas but the Winter Break or the Holiday Season. The genesis of Christmas is the story of the birth of the Savior. This is truly the greatest story ever told. Christmas, the point our calendar begins. The celebration of the birth of the Savior. This was without question Whitney Lee’s favorite holiday. She loved the gifts, both giving and receiving; spending time with the family; and the celebration of the birth of Jesus. This was Whitney’s story. Love, Sharing, Family and Jesus. What is your story? Get a head, fame, fortune, Bigger and Better? Or is it… serve, love and kindness. Like Jesus, we all have a story. Does your story fit the narrative you want to leave as your legacy? No one can ever top the Greatest Story Ever Told… the life of Jesus, but we can mold our story into an epic of human proportions. This Christmas, if you have not done so already, start making strides that serve, love and care for others. Help those in need, serve others, be the one to show up and assist when needed. Jesus came to save… we were created to serve, love and care for those within our house, family and neighborhood. Your story can have tremendous impact on the lives of those close to you and even those on the periphery. You never know who is watching. We can inundate someone with facts… unless they are written down, we soon forget them. BUT… when we engage with people and develop a story line about the relationship that will be remembered. Call the distant relatives, bring some cookies to the people you work with, care for the neighbor kids while mom and dad run Christmas errands. This Christmas engage others through your life story of service and love… which will then lead into stories and memories in their lives. When you do so, I know, it won’t soon be forgotten. An angel of the Lord appeared to him in a dream and said, “Joseph son of David, do not be afraid to take Mary home as your wife, because what is conceived in her is from the Holy Spirit. She will give birth to a son, and you are to give him the name Jesus, because he will save his people from their sins.” All this took place to fulfill what the Lord had said through the prophet: “The virgin will conceive and give birth to a son, and they will call him Immanuel” (which means “God with us”). Matthew 1:21-23 This year Thanksgiving will be different. This will be the first Thanksgiving holiday the family will be home since Whitney passed. The past several years we have been working college basketball out of the country. Because of COVID, all of that changed this year. While sad about the cancellations, there is a tremendous expression of Thanks to be home. All the Colorado family will be together, the blessing of a new grandson and a time to collectively say THANK YOU for this challenging year. Here is how… 1. Be Thankful in Actions. Colossians 3:17 whatever you do, whether in word or deed, do it all in the name of the LORD Jesus, giving thanks to God the Father through him. This encourages us to live out our faith through my actions and reactions. During this political season, this has been a stretch for everyone. This can be anything and everything we do… even in response to the hills and valleys of 2020. I can choose to have an attitude of gratitude towards God. 2. Be Thankful By Remembering. Psalm 77:11 I will remember the deeds of the LORD; yes, I will remember your miracles of long ago. This verse reminds us to be thankful for all the past and current blessings, despite the hardships of 2020. Thank you for provisions despite tight finances, a loving family and opportunities to serve during a pandemic. This reminds us of His faithfulness, which stirs our hearts towards thankfulness. 3. Be Thankful in Everything. 1 Thessalonians 5:18 give thanks in all circumstances; for this is God’s will for you in Christ Jesus. Giving thanks in everything can seem like a hard task to accomplish at times, especially in difficult circumstances. Besides COVID, Colorado has experienced terminal wild fires. We have staff and former board members lose it all. One can only imagine the losses… but we are called to say Thank You for all that has sustained us during this unprecedented year. As Whitney grew she loved to be involved in all things holiday! Thanksgiving was one event she and I relished… planning and cooking the menu brought us great joy. Watching her prep and brine the turkey, bake pies and desserts and placing the décor upon the tables... Those are memories I will forever cherish. If you have children or grandchildren… please involve them in these preparations. They are memories you will treasure the rest of your days. We can let 2020 take us down a trail of sadness and despair… or we can celebrate and be Thankful for the past blessings and the fact that we are alive despite the bumps and bruises along the highway of life. Happy Thanksgiving 2020! |
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